It’s been a painful few days.

I’ve been dealing with a headache that won’t go away, lasting all day and night. Nausea, no vomiting. Lack of appetite.

And, my shunt felt tight initially, pulling down the right side of my head. Thankfully that’s subsided.

I tried to see if I could hear “Sophy” (my shunt) this morning. It was quieter than normal.

I’ve gotten used to the sound of it draining when I get up. A source of comfort.

Now, day 4, it seems to be easing up. But, fatigue has set in. My body and brain feel like it’s taken a beating.

Yesterday I started the, “should I go to the hospital or shouldn’t I?”, debate with myself. Instead, I listened to some recordings of my previous consults with Dr T, just for some guidance.

He was clear; Even if it’s just a headache that won’t go away, regardless of any other symptoms, go to the hospital. And so, I negotiated with myself and decided if it doesn’t improve today after a massage, I’ll go.

If I had to be honest, I don’t want to. Praying it’s just a side effect of the cold I’ve had to deal with this last week.

This is nothing new to those of us diagnosed and living with Hydrocephalus. It would seem “simple” enough to go to the hospital if you’re not “feeling well”, but when it means possible brain surgery, it changes the narrative. To each their own.

Just another day of living life under pressure. Literally!